Joy AND Sorrow

I got angry at my Bible Study yesterday.

As in, maybe I sort of slammed it shut and wanted to tell off the author.

The concept was one I have heard throughout my life – the idea that if you are truly filled with the Holy Spirit then what “spills out” when you hit hard circumstances should be joy and thanksgiving. I believe that to be true, except not always, not all the time, not 100%.

I often feel like a complete failure whenever preachers or authors talk about Paul in his letter to the Philippians. There is always the emphasis that Paul is writing the letter from prison and yet he repeatedly talks about his joy; that he is rejoicing in the midst of his oppression. Paul is consistently held up as the ideal standard, someone to emulate. The idea being that if Paul is doing nothing but rejoicing while in prison, then shouldn’t we be able to rejoice in the midst of our circumstances, too?

But here’s the thing: Can we also acknowledge that this is the same man who wrote in 2 Corinthians 1:8, “For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself” (emphasis mine).

Did you catch that? The same man who writes about his joy while being in prison also talks about despairing of life itself. He felt both. He admitted to both. He expressed both.

Why couldn't my Bible Study talk about THAT??

Because I don't know about you, but I need to know that as Jesus loving, Holy Spirit filled people we have the freedom to feel, admit to, and express both joy and sorrow. And all of it is to the glory of God.

Sorrow is not the end story. Despair is not where we stay. But neither is joy always our immediate reaction. Sometimes feeling despair and sorrow, lamenting and bringing it all to the foot of the cross is the only way to get to the joy. And that process? The fact that joy isn’t our immediate response does not mean we do not love Jesus or that we are not filled with the Holy Spirit. It means we are human, in process, and living in a world that still feels the burdening effects of the fall. It means we are face to face with the reality that complete redemption has not happened yet and we are longing for it. It means that sometimes walking through the suffering is what forces us to "rely not on ourselves, but on God who raises the dead" (2 Corinthians 1:9b).

The Holy Spirit inside of us is our helper, our comforter (John 14:26), which means the fruit of the Spirit should be present, but it also means that it is the Holy Spirit we rely upon and allow to walk us through the grief. We do not have to lament alone. And God designed it that way. It is all to the glory of His name.

Maybe, if we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, it means we can turn to our helper and comforter and pour out our sorrow. Maybe, if we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, it means we can lament and grieve with freedom. And, maybe, if we have the Holy Spirit inside of us, it also means that we have hope that in time our mourning will be turned into dancing (Psalm 30:11) and we believe that joy truly does come with the morning (Psalm 30:5).